I haven’t written in months. I have wanted to, hmmm I would go so far as to say I have needed to, but something has kept me from being able to get the words out. I miss having this release. Things have been really off for me lately, not just with Ferdinand’s regression that always happens right before a big change in his schedule (like summer break) and the little Grand’s paternal unit keeping so much craziness going at all times, but with me, myself. The chronic pain has gone from a 6 or 7 every day up to a strong 15. The weird nerve stuff is freaking me out and these migraines have a sistah wanting to pull her eyeballs out sometimes. Fibro, febro, whatevs, this shi* sucks! I miss taking long walks just because or going to the park and walking the nature trail or just sitting by the pond and enjoying the peacefulness of it all. I miss going up and down my stairs without using the hand rails. I am too young for this mess.